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Putting Down the Welcome Mat To Vertigo

April 29, 2013

WelcomeFriday night I just didn’t feel right and didn’t know why. Then I woke up with early Saturday morning hoping the nausea I felt was the flu and not a MS relapse. Sounds strange right? How many people wish for the flu?

I would much rather have puked my guts out for a few days and be done with it. Then Sunday morning rolled around and I could not live in a place of denial any longer. I felt green and it had nothing to do with the food I was eating or a flu bug. Vertigo was hanging out in my body.

As unpredictable as MS can be, it makes unexpected visits with no real explanation. I decided at the moment of realization, I would try a different approach. I would love and embrace the vertigo. So I have put down the welcome mat. Although I would like to set some guidelines for this visitor, I know she will stay as long as she wants to and leave when she is ready. I have no idea how much of a roller coaster ride she will take me on. I will have to take that hour by hour and day by day as she will have her dormant times even if they are only for a few minutes, they will be there. I have already witnessed them within the past two and half days.

The part of this which seems to get easier is the familiarity I have with this new visitor. Her siblings have visited one by one. Each is unique yet, like raising children, it’s often most challenging with the first one, after that it less of shock and gets easier because the newness is less.

I trust eventually based on the past sibling visitors that this one will leave. I have a track record to prove it.

I also recognized, the more welcoming and less hostile I am, the easier it will be for both of us. Maybe I will even find some beauty in her appearance unexpectedly.

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